As strange as it was, I heard a child (11 years old) described his mother as "the hulk". He expressed that she yells a lot and swears at him like my mom did. He feels little like I felt and struggles internally. He confessed that him too feels shame for not loving his mom: she is a monster. He admitted that if his mother was not his mother, he would want nothing to do with her. I know the feeling. As we spoke, he kept saying I understood everything he was saying, he kept saying that's how I feel, how did I know... Well, my mother was also a hulk to me growing up. While, I encouraged him to speak up and comprehend he is not responsible for the well being of his mother, I also could not stop thinking how many of us are out there. He shared that his mother had a tough childhood, hence he feels he can excuse her behavior. NO!!! Absolutely not. This is not his responsibility. I fear for this child, his childhood has now been stolen from him too.
Our mothers are obviously sick and incapable of being "mothers". I confess it hurt to hear him and see him cry quietly while attempting to make excuses for his mother's behaviors. I wish I could make our mothers get better. Hearing him, made me realize that the pain I felt is a result of it. He kept saying that he wanted to save her like I wished I saved mine. I informed him that it was not his responsibility, he is not a doctor. Hulk is not a mother. Hulk is sick.
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